Surviving Seasons of Change
/Changes were on the horizon of my life and so many areas seem to be unsettled. Life changes, church changes, financial changes-you name it and it was up for grabs. Seasons of change. They were the growing-up-and-growing-older-kind-of-changes, ya know? I was in the season of life that make a mama’s heart swell with joy and break all at once. The enemy was busy lobbing his fiery darts at my weary shield of faith, while I was trying to get a grip on my middle-aged mess. The lesson? Surviving seasons of change.
My daughter and I went shopping the other day. We had an awesome day together just the two of us. On our way home, storm clouds were gathering courage to unleash autumn fury. The sky looked eerily beautiful as the fall colors became like fire against the dark sky. God poked my thoughts. The trees are in the season of dying, and yet they looked nothing short of vibrant. Was it possible to be in the process of dying and do it beautifully? Was is possible to embrace change with grace? God, what are you trying to tell me in my season of change?
I desperately wanted to embrace all that God had for me, and do it with beauty and grace, but- ugh. Honestly, it wasn’t happening. God poked my heart and reminded me that He works best when storms are brewing. As I pondered the changing of the seasons on the drive home, I began asking myself a few questions.
Do I willingly strive to lay myself at the Cross and marvel at the new creation that God wants me to be?
...or do I hold on to the same old junk thinking it keeps me safe?
Do I joyfully die to the things that are holding me back in my walk with Christ?
...or do I assume that God is trying to steal my joy by telling me to let it go?
Do I embrace the pruning in my life so God can bring about a bountiful harvest?
...or do I resist change and by doing so, exchange it for bitterness?
Do I trust that if I let go of my self-centered desires that it will give way to something even more beautiful?
…or do I cling to the familiar and trade God’s best yes for status quo?
This phrase kept clicking in my brain in time with the steady rhythm of wipers against the car window.
ONLY GOD CAN MAKE DEATH A BEAUTIFUL THING.
ONLY GOD CAN MAKE DEATH A BEAUTIFUL THING.
ONLY GOD CAN MAKE DEATH A BEAUTIFUL THING.
I wanted more in my season of change than mediocre and messy. I knew I needed to die to a whole lot of things, but I had no idea it was me that needed to die to self. I assumed that God just needed to make my circumstances change! “If those people would just …”, “ If God could only …”, “ When the Lord moves …” Yuck. God poked my conscience again. He could change my circumstances, but the same old self would still walking upright making the same old messes, only in a new place with new people. Nope, I needed to die to myself. I needed to die to my desires and exchange them for something greater than my own plans. I needed more of Jesus and less of me.
The rain suddenly stopped just as fast as it had begun, and instantly the sun streamed out from behind the storm clouds. God, in His matchless power, showed me grace in living color . As I snapped this picture, my heart melted into worship. God keeps His promises to His kids in any season.
Related Post: How to Forgive Someone When Your Heart is Hurting
God began speaking peace over me. He wasn’t going to change my circumstances, He was changing me. All of the inner voices that condemned me started losing their grip. It was like my eyes opened for the first time. If I wanted my circumstances to change, He had to start with changing my heart. If I want to bear fruit, I must learn to fall before Him in worship and learn to die to self. He held this beloved daughter as I cried out from the depths of my strongholds to be delivered. He wiped my tears as I once again put my trust in Christ to be forgiven and start new. What did God see as I laid there in broken worship?
He saw His beloved bride who never lost her VIBRANCE, she had only misplaced her purpose. He didn’t see her dead works, He saw the work the CROSS OF CHRIST ACCOMPLISHED IN HER AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL. The seasons of change in my life was not a punishment, but an answer to prayer. Before the foundation of the world he promised THE DEATH OF HIS SON--WOULD MAKE CHANGE POSSIBLE. He died so that I would live. That is what He promised. I AM FOUND IN CHRIST and I have His enduring promise that when I let go of self, He won’t let go of me. And you know what? It’s when I walk away from my dreams and plans that I can truly live. I realize His plans go far above what I could have ever even asked for, or imagined.
Yes, grace and beauty win. Seasons change and I embrace Jesus.
